Life is constantly changing. Each experience is an outcome of a previous experience, but also determines the next. From good to bad and everything in between, experiences are puzzle pieces that come together to create the whole picture.
A lot of times we wonder why we are going through certain struggles. The truth is, we need to experience the bad along with the good in order to get where we are today. And we need to be where we are today in order to reach the places we hope to reach.
We have options on how to handle situations as they occur, but we may not always have the tools we need to choose the best option. What may seem like the best option today, could actually prove to be the worse option later. "If I knew then what I know now." is a great example.
The older we grow, the more lessons we learn the more knowledge we hold giving us more tools to use in decision making. bad experience can also make us learn lessons the hard way, but also make better decisions that we have better control of.
For example my parents' lack of positive parenting skills has created a childhood of negative experiences, bad memories and a jaded person. Although I will never claim to be perfect, I am greatful for this memories and experiences. If my mom and dad hadn't been such horrible role models I may have never seen the damage that can be done. Now that I am a mother, I can't imagine putting my children through the things I had to endure.
Most people would think that it's common sense to not behave the way my parents have around their children, but you can't fairly judge people without experiencing these people in person and in everyday life.
To attempt to put it into perspective, my positive happy memories of my mom attempting to be a mom end at the age 4. My dad was around most of my life, although I always knew he loved me he was more like a sibling or a friend than he was a parent. I grew up being exposed to drug sells, drug use, sex and domestic violence.
As an adult, wife, mother and career driven woman in the cooperate world my life couldn't be any further from the life I had no control over as a child. Although I had no control over the experiences thrown at me as a child, no tools or knowledge on how to act in the best way; I can use those experiences, combined with my knowledge and tools I have gained over the years to created a whole new set of situations and options that will map the childhood memories I am leaving with my children.
A lot of people assume they get it, think they know what they would have done, or believe they know what I should have done. The truth is no one has all of the answers all of the time. No one can truly get it without living in the moment.
My goal with this blog is to help other people who may have questions based on similar situations, help people to better understand me and maybe why other people are a certain way. Please respond, ask quetions and even give opinions, but please keep in mind that people are humans, with feelings, confusion and in the end wants to be excepted just like everyone else. Constructive criticism goes a long way, without hating and bashing.
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